I wanted to do a little follow-up on the post I wrote a couple of days ago.
I have many “mom friends,” those who work full-time, part-time, are SAHM’s, homeschoolers, private and public-schoolers. And I love all of them for different reasons. I don’t pick my friends based on whether they do things like I do but whether I like them as actual people. I’ve been choosing friends like this since middle school.
So far, so good.
But because we’re all different, what works for one of us (or what is a priority for her), doesn’t (or isn’t) for another. And, sometimes, if I write about how I love a clean house, or how I’m trying to exercise for ten minutes a day, or how I make my kids do Latin, it makes some of my friends feel bad.
This, in turn, makes me feel bad.
Because, the thing is, we all have different gifts and abilities. We have unique kids and husbands and personalities. We have specific preferences and things we can’t stand. We have weaknesses, blind spots, baggage we haven’t yet shed.
None of this makes us “better” or “worse” than any other mother.
And when I say I keep a clean house, you can know one thing for sure: I have other things that are “messy” in my life–things like my ongoing battle with depression, the fact that I’m often not very patient, that lots of times I give my kids vitamins in lieu of green veggies.
At 37 years old, after 15 years of marriage and 13 years of parenting, I believe this now more than I ever have: we’ve all got our things. And it will be OK. At least I believe that on my good days.
So when I talk about my little routines, or how the kids and I read poetry together, or that everyone does their own laundry in this house, please understand: there’s also lots of saying ‘I’m sorry I yelled,‘ lots of ‘I can’t believe we’re still dealing with this issue,’ and ‘Mom, where are my clean socks?‘
I like a clean house. But what I want even more, what I’m asking God to work in me, is a clean heart.
I can do the former (and I do), but only He can do the latter.
And that’s the most important thing of all, no matter what my toilets look like.
P.S. I still think Challies missed the boat on clean houses. 🙂